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  • The end is near –

    dusky light struggles between the dark clouds

    shrouding the fearful sky

    as tearful crows caw

    and bellicose worms gnaw incessantly,

    ravaging vast wheatfields

    decimating them into a b […]

    • I love precise vocabulary – descriptive instead of just evaluative. You made some excellent choices here, creating a vivid word picture.

  • It is the spinal column

    that supports a human body

    like a tree trunk

    that holds a tree together…

    It is the integrity

    of who you are,

    of your values and  beliefs

    your ruminations and choices,

     which mak […]

    • NetaQ replied 4 weeks ago

      I love how you approach the prompt with this piece!! Integrity is the standard and you eloquently compared and shape this poem identifying the human connection, biologically and emotionally, then prompting the reader to self-identify with this nuanced truth. Very nice indeed!

    • Jesmond,
      A beautiful piece–I like the way you kind of backed into “standard.” Thanks for writing.
      Best to you,
      Wanda Lovan

    • I enjoyed this. I liked the way you linked the spinal column, a tree trunk and integrity, each unique to the individual.

    • Hello Jesmond,
      I like the way your poem zigzags between spinal column and tree trunk to illustrate the structural way integrity defines us. I enjoyed reading this.

  • HI Evon,
    Thanks for your comment – wish I did not have to write it but it is a stark reminder of something that is unfortunately ongoing in today’s world and because of how things happen we become numb to these tragedies – whilst the war in Ukraine is still underway, other conflicts such as in Yemen, Syria etc.are still happening and have been…[Read more]

  • Thanks Christian for your comments. It is a real challenge to stick to a theme and getting the rhymes and rhythms spot on – not to mention the twist at the end. A tip on how I tackled this is by exploring a number of highly relevant words and others that rhyme with them, grouped them schematically and worked in reverse. The iambic pentameter…[Read more]

  • Hi Riana, thank you for your comments. When I wrote this poem, I had the Ukraine conflict in mind but wanted to infer a sense of universality by not mentioning anything regarding this particular conflict. Re – the last comment, I deliberately decided that I break the rhythmic pattern of the iambic pentameter by using two anapestic and two iambic…[Read more]

  • It’s dark – it’s time to pack and say goodbye,

    Seek refuge in the midst of the cold night.

    All’s gone, debris and rubble, wrecks in sight

    And children flee whilst airplanes fly so high

    Amongst the bloody cloud […]

    • This pulled at my heart. The language is somewhat formal, giving it and older feel than just this most recent war atrocity. I think it’s quite moving. If you would accept a suggestion, look at the two lines toward the end that both contain the word “suffer” and see if you can change one of them up a bit. Nice work!

    • Very timely, considering what is happening in the Ukraine. Your poem captures the lose, the pain, and futility of this needless and crazy act by one horrible person. How can this be happening today? I guess I thought we were better, we were smarter. But we are not. Good poem, but I wish you didn’t have to write it. Evon

      • HI Evon,
        Thanks for your comment – wish I did not have to write it but it is a stark reminder of something that is unfortunately ongoing in today’s world and because of how things happen we become numb to these tragedies – whilst the war in Ukraine is still underway, other conflicts such as in Yemen, Syria etc.are still happening and have been lost in the news.

    • Hi Jesmond,
      Well done for getting the rhymes and rhythms/metre of your sonnet spot on. It’s really difficult and your subject is one that is so emotional, you don’t want to change the meaning to fit the form. It’s a very appropriate poem for these days. Thanks for sharing.

      • Thanks Christian for your comments. It is a real challenge to stick to a theme and getting the rhymes and rhythms spot on – not to mention the twist at the end. A tip on how I tackled this is by exploring a number of highly relevant words and others that rhyme with them, grouped them schematically and worked in reverse. The iambic pentameter offers an additional challenge since you have to choose particular words with specific rhythmic structures and eliminate others – so the proper choice of synonym is important to further convey the meaning and emotion.

    • Hi Jesmond. This is such a touching poem. The images are so vivid, it really makes one thankful for having a safe and whole home to spend the night in with those you love close by.
      Although this poem is especially relevant now, I really like that it has no specific identifying elements such as place names or dates. It gives it a timelessness and makes it almost universal in its message.
      I’m not sure if you were deliberately trying for iambic pentameter, but if so my only suggestion really is that the line “And survivors will only have to dream,” threw off this rhythm slightly. Perhaps you can consider tweaking it slightly so that the line starts with “survivors,” as this will not make the reader feel as if “sur-” should be emphasised.
      A potent poem, well done!

      • Hi Riana, thank you for your comments. When I wrote this poem, I had the Ukraine conflict in mind but wanted to infer a sense of universality by not mentioning anything regarding this particular conflict. Re – the last comment, I deliberately decided that I break the rhythmic pattern of the iambic pentameter by using two anapestic and two iambic feet – I thought that this shift in rhythmic pattern would break the rhythmic uniformity close to the end of the sonnet and is evocative of the disturbance that comes as a result of war.

  • Thanks Sue for the comment

  • Thanks Christian for the comment

  • Thanks for the comment

  • When snarky oligarchs bark

    and voracious sharks devour small fry,

    decency slips into the dark

    and innocent people cry…

    When armoured tanks

    wander lustfully

    into bloody streets and parks,

    when caterpillar […]

    • Tremendously powerful. Tears are running down my cheeks. You nailed it, the words flow and evoke so much. This must be shared with the world.

    • Hi Jesmond, images of conflicts, ever ongoing it seems, bring the reality right to the reader. When these are witnessed, how can one feel anymore than fear and hopelessness and you capture that sensation beautifully. Wonderful work. Thank you for your poem. – Otter

    • Hello Jesmond,
      Your poem is bang uptodate and full of truth about the current situation. I very much like the first line of ‘ark’ sounds. It’s a very empathetic poem. Thanks for sharing it.

    • Evocative and powerful poem.

  • Thanks for your comment.

  • Thanks for your comment.

  • So fragile

    But yet it lifts us through the sculptured clouds of our life,

    Flying like an aeroplane or wandering in a hot air balloon…

    Love

    You will find it there –

    It’s fresh in moments of despair … […]

  • So fragile

    But yet it lifts us through the sculptured clouds of our life,

    Flying like an aeroplane or wandering in a hot air balloon…

    Love

    You will find it there –

    It’s fresh in moments of despair … […]

  • When rose petals fade

    and chilly nights take over –

    seedlings sprout again.

    • This is a lovely poem about a rose plant, but also encompasses a profound theme/lesson for the reader that is looking for it. Well done!

    • I love your haiku. To me it means the circle of life continues in spite of rain and snow, and winter of the soul. Just wait a little while. Thanks so much for the lovely thought!

    • Hello Jesmond,
      Your poem gives us hope to sustain us through winter’s darkness. Thank you.

    • Sweet and simple yet profound. I love the message of hope in the face of hardship. Thank you for sharing.

  • When Muse strikes my mind like a bolt of lightning

    refracting  through a dusky sea of grey matter

    reflecting sublime images and ethereal landscapes;

    thoughts quibble, drizzle and dribble

    whilst my pen […]

    • Hi Jesmond, you capture the chaos that is creation and tie it all up with the receptions in between the first and last lines. The creative process can be felt in your words. Thank you for your poem.

    • This poem reflects traces of epic style features The Muse stands out. Enjoyed the rhymes too. Well composed.

    • Hello Jesmond,
      I like all your alliteration and near rhymes – excellent. You are lucky to have such a vigorous and energetic muse. I hope the metaphor rainbows continue to have gold at the end of them.

  • Thanks for your comments.

  • Thanks for your comments

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jeszmond

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@jeszmond

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