• Thanks for reading and your kind feedback Wanda. Glad you enjoyed it and much appreciated.

  • Great poem Wanda. You painted the feeling of autumn very well in my mind, using different senses and I loved the images.

    The rhythm was good and I enjoyed the rhyme – I was thrown a little when the pattern changed though.

    Thanks for sharing.

  • Thanks for reading and I’m glad you liked the metaphor. Much appreciated.

  • Great alliteration, and the short lines make the poem punchy. I too could hear this as a tv or radio ad.

    I do wonder if there is a hidden message though. Is Jasmine poisonous – the use of courage? Another 13 – unlucky number? I get a feeling of murder here and you might not want to go with. I could be way off track, but there is a suspicious…[Read more]

  • Great poem Hanri. I love the war of life and soldiering on. Your metaphor is very appropriate and the words flow well.

    Not a lot of words, but powerful. I too appreciate the resolutions silently begging to be buried in honour. Looking for a little bit of hope that the whole year isn’t a failure.

    Thanks for sharing.

  • Love it Christy and I can sooooo relate at the moment. It feels like my head is empty of anything creative.

    I love the rhythm and rhyme of your poem and the subject is appropriate.

    Great job and thanks for sharing.

  • Beautiful poem Tom. I love the images that you paint in my mind. Your words transported me from 32 degree sunny South Africa to the impending cold.

    The piece flows wonderfully. I don’t know why, but the end gave me a peaceful feeling of the acceptance to the end of life by disease – unseen foe. I looked up the mountain you mentioned and the…[Read more]

  • In the scratch of black vinyl

    Stuck in the rut of repetition

    Between grooves of melodic harmony

    Another day passes in misery

    On a turntable of return

    Brief moments on the musical track

    Snatches of joy […]

    • Hi
      I enjoyed your choice of linking life with a record on a turntable. CA

    • Wlovan replied 1 week ago

      Hi, Debbie
      I was right there with you and that old turntable! Enjoyed your poem. Keep up the good work.
      Best,
      Wanda Lovan

    • Hi Debbie! You managed to reflect the turning, turning motion of the turntable very well in your word choice and rhythms. I liked that. Two lines intrigued me. There must be a deeply personal message or experience behind them, and I’m curious: “Desperate clawing for change / Yields more gouged score marks / From the dark sunk depression” and “Life’s mellifluent sound / Waiting for a fine keyed ear / To savor and revel…”

    • Hello Debbie,
      I much enjoyed all the musical and turntable references as a metaphor to the humdrum of life. And the ending which seems to me to say that harmony is good is just that – good. Thanks for sharing this.

  • Great poem Liz. I loved the lines where she thought she belonged in the frozen food section.

    I enjoyed the repeated lines as a statement that it doesn’t matter because love is love and she managed to find it, and perhaps she didn’t expect it once and surprised herself. I hope she managed to hold onto that once in a lifetime love.

    I liked the…[Read more]

  • You yanked me into the most gorgeous scene with your first line Christian and from there on it was a delight for my ears. Your words and the way you expressed simple things like crumbs on a chair was gorgeous. Love your poem and the heart tugging memories of granny and the bowl that carries her memory.

    The piece flowed and took me through a…[Read more]

  • Thanks for reading and your feedback Christian. Much appreciated.

  • Thanks for reading and your feedback Juanita. I appreciate you taking the time to read it more than once.

  • Thanks for reading and your feedback Wanda. I appreciate you taking the time to read it again.

  • Thanks for reading and your kind feedback Jane. Always appreciate your comments.

  • Loved your poem Jane. I could feel the pain in the words and the numbness.

    The piece flowed well and I liked the structure and your word choice.

    Great work.

  • Thanks for reading and your kind feedback Deb. Much appreciated.

  • Wow Wanda that is so cool to know some of the history. That’s what makes the stories.

  • Great haiku Mark. I can feel and see the beautiful bowl sparkling.

    I also love that last line because it conveys the strength of the glass and its humble beginnings.

  • Oh Deb this tale is beautiful and sad all rolled into one. I loved the details you mention of the mother.

    This is one of my favourite lines:
    ‘Her mind was askew, itchy,’
    I love the idea of an itchy mind

    Thank you for ending it on a happier note as I’m a sucker for the heaviness being lightened, even though life might not always work like…[Read more]

  • This poem touched my heart Neta. I could feel the deep-seated sadness and an idea of what if I’d chosen differently.

    I liked the repetition as it emphasizes the loneliness.

    I too loved this line:
    “life walked down Broadway. ”

    The couplets work well for me because it gives the reader a moments pause to absorb what you’ve just said and…[Read more]

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Debbie

Profile picture of Debbie

@debbieg

Active 6 days, 9 hours ago
Short Story : 3
Poetry : 9
WTC : 0
52 Scenes : 0
Dialogue : 0
Flash Fiction : 0