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  • Hey Maruschka, great to hear from you, and trust all goes well? Thanks for reading, and commenting. You pulled me back into this piece, which I have been meaning to update for a while. It was fun to write and I am glad you took something away. All the best for 2021 and beyond, and do stay safe, stay well. Regards, Seyi

  • Seyi commented on the post, Hyped by Seyi 4 weeks ago

    Hey again Amy, and many thanks for reading. Yeah, that main character was meant to generate some conflicting emotions, with sympathy being a huge part. Thanks for your kind words, and I have had limited huge success with getting my short stories published, but I must admit I have not tried to do this for a while now. Thanks to your comments, I…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, Snail's Pace by Sue 1 month ago

    Hey Sue and how goes it? Great to come back to your writing, in time to meet your main character, she of the beautiful name. I agree the pacing of your story is hypnotic and the wonderful descriptions are great tentpoles. I’m still smiling at ‘I began to chew over the poetry I’d been getting myself into a stew over,’ to name one sentence among m…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, HYPE! By Lenore Butcher 1 month ago

    Hey Lenore and how goes it? I really liked the way you paced this story. The intro is great, and the ‘glub glubbing’ line is truly memorable. I liked the sense of mystery you injected, with the differently styled calls. I did not think it was a marketing gimmick, I was guessing ‘intro to spy thriller’ at least so well done with the…[Read more]

  • Hey Michael and how goes it? I echo Kim’s comments, your world-building is brilliant. I actually liked the ‘tech-speak,’ it all seemed to work with the context in which you introduced it. I also like the way you slipped in the idea of ‘Imperials’ as different and let us know Tenn is a ‘Federation’ scientist. I am really hopeful you will expand on…[Read more]

  • Hey Sharon, hi and how goes it? This is a very well written, if slightly-scary piece. I like how you conveyed the bulk of the storlyine in that first section, through dialogue and a few bits of body language. I do wonder how complicit Sam was with his own deception, but that’s a wonderful thing not to know for sure. I really enjoyed this piece.…[Read more]

  • Hello Yerusha and how goes it? This is a great setup, with characters that all seem like Main Characters (if you know what I mean). The protocols that would forbid Romily from speaking directly with Malik if he was indeed a King (and the argument that makes him a King) are all well conveyed in the brief conversation. I will look into your archive…[Read more]

  • Eish, Georgina, Southern Gothic is dark and twisted. I love it. That last line took my breath away. I think I recall Wisdom had ‘interfered’ with Daisy during her many trips to the fam, which could explain her hyper-sexuality but you wrote her level of messed up to another level. I will go back into your archive to remind myself how Aiden and…[Read more]

  • Hey Francis and how goes it? You crafted a really believable story here with some wonderful dialogue and very memorable turns of phrase. I particularly like the introductory sentences (though I think you may have re-used ‘copse’ a couple too many times). I loved the line ‘a jazz band was heaving it on the side.’ It’s very visual, as was the last…[Read more]

  • Eish, Amy, you have an awesome sense of humor and it shines through your writing. I smiled at ‘the Paula Radcliffe look-alike leading a team of Royal Marines into combat’ and laughed out loud at ‘family-sized bags of sweets.’ The line about ‘people hurting themselves on building sites’ still puzzles me but I get that your narrator was in a bad…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, Area 52 by Seyi 1 month ago

    Hey again JM and how goes it? Thanks for your kind words, this was one story that came to life from the ashes of another, more complex one and I am glad it kind of tied together in the end. I still have some work to do on it though. All the very best, have a great end of the year, and good luck for 2021, and beyond. Regards, Seyi

  • Seyi commented on the post, Model by Anthony 1 month ago

    Hey Anthony and how goes it? A very cool storyline and a nice twist on the usual powerful, older, male gatekeeper wielding all sorts of power over a young, hungry female striver. I liked the ways you showed Liane’s power and her standing in the industry with the way Ross pretty much begged for a break from her. In fact, I think you may not have…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, That's life by pfgpowell 1 month ago

    Hey PFG and how goes it? This is pretty clever and the way you cloaked the ‘plan’ in innuendo made it clear that there was a hidden meaning or meanings. I looked to the name of the participants (Gabe, Mike, and Rafe) but I regret I still didn’t ‘get’ it till I read your comments. Perhaps if you had made Gabe the character most relied on my the…[Read more]

  • Hey Melissa, and how goes it? This is brilliant. The concept is great and I really appreciate the way your sense of humor comes through your main character(s). The only point I’d make is with regard to the phrase ‘vantage point,’ in your first sentence. To me, this implied a viewpoint high above the crowds or from a location where Kalendio…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, Hyped by Becky Crookham 1 month ago

    Hey Becky, and how goes it? You painted Aunty Agnes very very clearly in those great opening sentences. The only detail that held me up was the one about her camel-colored coat. If the belt was tied, however loosely, it was tough for me to see the coat ‘billowing’ behind her. That did not stop me from enjoying her flawed character, via the many…[Read more]

  • Hey Beth, hi, and how goes it? Your intro sentences are very powerful, but I think the second sentence (beginning ‘She took a long breath..’) is the stronger. You may have achieved the same or greater impact by stopping it at ‘letting the song on the radio finish,’ though. You unfold Dylan’s high-maintenance character very efficiently, and it does…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, Hyped by Seyi 1 month, 1 week ago

    Hey again Michael and how goes it? Thanks for reading and for your kind comments. Stay safe, and all the best. Seyi

  • Wow! Sounds like a great idea? All the best, and regards. Seyi

  • Hey Michael and how goes it? I liked your story, especially the sometimes-rational explanations for the phenomena surrounding Melissa (cows with intestinal problems, too much fermented jam, and her book-driven practical solutions to everyday problems). The fact that she did have actual magical powers was slipped in almost as an afterthought, and I…[Read more]

  • Seyi commented on the post, Hyped by Seyi 1 month, 2 weeks ago

    Hey again Deb and many thanks. I’ll be glad if I can establish some sort of recognizable style, I just need to try and find ways to write different genres than the ones I have been doing, while keeping that voice. You picked up on all the signals I was trying to send about my main character, and I appreciate the time you took for these comments.…[Read more]

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