Two Peas in a Pod by Marcena Hooks
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Dear Mama,
I am becoming
More and more like you
Developing conditions
At age forty
Ailments like
High blood pressure
Cholesterol
But you were older than forty
When your health
Failed
Forty-six: cancer
Asthma: fifty-nine
Seventy: Angel Wings
I always said
I wanted to be like you
When I grew up
But this is not what I meant
I meant love
Sharing an open door
Meals
Gathering and cooking
Writing and gardening
Praying and praising God
Faith
Not these ailments
Some of which I’ve
Developed on my own
Bad habits
Others could not be helped
Blame it on DNA
I have no choice
But to accept
I am becoming
More and more like you
As I age like fine wine
May I have cheese with that please?
But the doctor says no
I am happy with becoming
Just like you, Mom
In shape, stance, substance, and structure
This stability
Unsurpassed endurance
As I develop
Into you, connected
Just like two peas in a pod
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- : Free verse
This went straight to my heart. It’s beautiful and deep. Very well written poem.
Hello Naina, and thank you for reading and commenting. I appreciate your kind words regarding my poem, and like the contrast of you describing it as beautiful and deep. Thanks again!
This clenched my heart. I don’t usually comment on the personal message in a poem, but this hit me in a very personal place. I am very very surprised and grateful for that.
Hello MA, I am both relieved and a bit regretful about your response. First, let me apologize for such a late reply, but I haven’t logged onto the site since I posted. I guess this poem did what it was supposed to do and that is invoke emotions in the reader. I appreciate your feedback and for taking the time to read it. I just don’t want it to make you too sad…thanks again.
I loved the progression of the poem and the sentiment was beautifully rendered. I’m just wondering whether because you framed it as a letter at the beginning you could end the frame with a signing off of some sort at the end?
Hello Dianne, and thank you for sharing your input. I apologize for such a late reply. I will definitely consider ending this as you suggested when I revise it. That is something I did not even think about. I appreciate you.
No worries. I hope the input is useful. 🙂
There is a certain longing that underscores your tribute to your mother , and resignation that you are becoming her – am glad you also highlighted the positives because I am sure she was much more than the sum of her failing health.
I found this poignant and a little sad
Hello Kim, and thank you for reading my work and giving feedback. I love how you described it as a longing and resignation too. Wow, that’s powerful and something I didn’t think of when writing it. And yes, my dear mother was definitely more than her failing health. It’s just that ultimately, she succumbed to it; therein lies the sadness. I appreciate your input.
Hi Marcena – I guess we inherit the good and the bad from our parents – genes, habits, attitudes etc – this is a lovely balance of what you have taken away from your relationship with your mother. Lovely.
Hello Deryn, and happy (late) New Year. 😉 Sorry for the late response but I haven’t been logged onto the site in a while. As always, I thank you for reading my poem and giving such kind feedback. I agree with you that some things we inherit are DNA, and others are habits as you said. Thanks again!
Hi Marcena
I was touched by your poem. So sincere and so full of meaning and love.
It is also a special way of seeing one that turns into two.
Thank you for this excellent piece.
Hello Nissan, and thanks so much for your kind feedback. My apologies for such a late reply, as I haven’t logged onto this site since this posting. I am glad to hear you were touched by my poem. I appreciate you reading it.
I don’t want to call this a sad poem because it is filled with beautiful memories.
I have come to the realization that when we say we want to be like someone, we have to be specific in what aspect because words have power.
Hello Halimah, and my apologies for such a tardy reply. I haven’t logged on here since this last posting of mine. I appreciate your feedback and reminder that words do have power. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
Hi Marcena, what a wonderful Ode to a mother (is this written for your mother). It is very beautiful and full of such praise for a loved mother. But just a little bit or irony, in that wanting to be like her mother she also gets the bad health and illness. I like the last three lines you leave us with:
As I develop
Into you, connected
Just like two peas in a pod
Well done and thanks for sharing:)
Hi Jane, and I apologize for such a late reply. I haven’t been on here since this last poem posted in December. Yes, this was based on truth regarding my mother. I appreciate your kind words and feedback. I like those last lines also. Thank you so much for commenting. Much love!