To the oceans edge – Casey S.

  • : YA - fantasy -adventure
  • : This was so surreal! We finished our first drafts!!!
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SJ
SJ
4 months ago

Hi Casey,
I have enjoyed reading your work. In every scene I read, you use great detail to paint a picture of what is happening in the story. It was easy to immerse myself in the scenes.
It was tragic that all of the villagers perished, but I agree with Riana, it is fitting. After all of the tragedy, a bit of humor works well and lightens the mood.
Somewhere I read or was told that a story should not leave the reader with the idea that there will be a sequel. I had to change my ending because of this. The original ending of my story would’ve been epic but I changed it.
However, I like your ending. It doesn’t bother me that there is a hint of a sequel.
Throughout this year, you have developed characters with depth and personality. You took me on a wonderful journey.
I hope you will join the 6 month rewrite.
My best to you.

Riana N
4 months ago

Hi Casey. I am so happy for them that they finally made it off the island! All the lives that were lost in the event are quite tragic, but I think it was fitting. Giving the story an overly happy ending would’ve given it a less convincing feel.
I like how with the final line of the scene you’ve shown how the relationship between Talia and Ryker has grown and how they had come to a place of complete sincerity and trust.
The bit of humour here really helps to lighten the severity of the loss.
I know I haven’t read most of your scenes, but from the ones I’ve read it felt like you’ve tied up most of the ends, and the characters have all reached a state of peace to some extent, which makes for a satisfying conclusion. Although it does feel like you are leaving the door open for a sequel? The last sentence is very suggestive of more story coming, so my only suggestion would be perhaps to give the last paragraph a slightly more final tone (or at least a taking-a-short-break-before-the-sequel tone).
Well done Casey, your story is very imaginative and I have enjoyed greatly the scenes I have read! Congrats! 😉

Michael Corvo
4 months ago

Surreal indeed! I can’t believe we’ve come to the end of this story. What a journey! I have to selfishly confess that I would have loved to have SEEN Talia and Tobias defeating the shadow create and THEN have Talia pass out and have no memory of what happened after. I’m also picturing how vulnerable they all are on the makeshift raft. It seems a stretch that they would be willing to make a detour rather than head straight for the mainland. Even a small storm or squall could spell doom and disaster. Still, I would like to understand the final mystery of the compass tattoo.

I’ll be revising my Violette and Corlwyn stories in the intensive 6-month 52 Scenes rewrite. Hope to see you there!