The Light is Low by Peggy Rockey – Scene 46 – Roy / Magera

  • : Contemporary Fiction, Thriller

Comments

  1. Kathy Sanford

    Whew, my heart is pounding and I’m out of breath. That truck chase scene was so well written. I could see and feel it clearly. Was Shiva in the black Mercedes? I’d probably have remembered that if reading all at once. This is definitely a book I wouldn’t be able to put down.

  2. Jan

    Hi Peggy,

    Bravo! Your talent for writing action never fails to amaze and impress me! I was in the camion being tossed around in the chase, that was absolutely incredible, well done!
    So Roy and Williams are bringing the pieces together and on their way to the shoot out – I appreciated the mini recap here of what happened at the New Moon and it seems that Shiva is a known felon. You might have mentioned his record before (and I forgot the detail apologies) but I think it’d be a good idea here to remind us why this specific hunter is such a special prize himself, for the good guys.

    The ending is really sad – “their struggle through life had ended” – how are you able to move me so deeply with only six words? I understand their selfblame is irrational, but their feelings of guilt were the cherry on the melancholy cake.

    Beautiful Peggy, well done on Nr 46!

    1. Peggy (PJ) Rockey Post author

      Here I am blushing and humbled by your praise! With six more scenes left most of the high action is finished, just a few bad guys and some loose ends to wrap up. It’s been one heck of a ride! I appreciate your comment about reinforcing why Shiva is wanted by the police – maybe that’ll make his death that much more impactful.

  3. Peggy (PJ) Rockey Post author

    Thanks, Georgiana! Magera and Benji likely feel responsible because they were the ones that hatched the plan. It’s irrational, in that the girls would have had a far worse fate had they not been rescued, but nonetheless, their actions specifically led to the deaths of these girls. I love your comment about picturing the movie!!!

  4. Julie

    Hi Peggy, your talent for powerful action scenes is awesome. I galloped through with your pacing techniques. I could see and feel everything in that truck chase. Poor Magera, I think her initial response is entirely in keeping with her character. And we do need carnage and collateral…. I was surprised that three of the girls were dead, rather than concussed but can imagine how this happened in such a violent chase. I did share Ben’s question about the last explosion though. My God, I hope Shiva is not still alive……I really do think you have a movie on your hands here. Fabulous. And yes, we so need the romance to calm us down from the adrenaline rush. 🙂

    1. Peggy (PJ) Rockey Post author

      Thanks for the feedback, Julie, I appreciate it. I’ve added some details to the tire being blown out to take away the ambiguity, and I should probably have a clear indication that Shiva did indeed die in the crash.

  5. Ben Hunt

    Hi Peggy, the car chase was awesome with a wonderful escalation of the tension and the perfect fast and furious pace and I too loved the fact that Roy is starting to look at Helen in that way…
    I have a couple of quick questions if that’s ok. ‘Another explosion rocked the truck…’ It’s probably just me (and I apologise if it is – I have covid at the moment so my brain is pretty fuzzy) but that confused me a little. There was a bullet hole before so I took it that Shiva is shooting at them with a normal gun. Is the explosion the result of a tyre being shot at and blowing up? It would make sense as that would throw the truck over but as I said, it might just be my confusion. It’s a minor picky thing in any case but it slowed me down a little trying to work it out in that wonderfully gripping action.
    The other thing is that the fact that three girls have died is powerful, like Sudha said, to emphasise how bad the truck chase was and for the moral dilemma. I’m just wondering how Magera can tell that they’re dead and that Susu isn’t just by looking. Did Daria check for a pulse and make a sign perhaps?
    I hope you don’t mind. It’s a really great scene and what I really want to know is whether Shiva is still in that Merc… xx

    1. Peggy (PJ) Rockey Post author

      I’m so sorry to hear you have covid, Ben, that’s awful. I hope and pray for a speedy recovery.
      Thanks for the great questions as well. The second explosion was the tire being shot, I hoped that would be clear, but it sounds like I should call it out as a definitive action.
      As well as the three girls who died. I don’t want to get too graphic, so maybe I could say something like ‘but for three others, she would soon learn, their struggle through life had ended…”

  6. SM

    Hi Peggy-
    That truck chase scene was really well done. I could feel the action and the lurching and tipping. I like the moral dilemma of Magera–Was she right or wrong? Did those three girls die because of her and Benji’s headstrong actions?
    Very murky, which of course makes for great storytelling.
    You’re also planting seeds between Roy and Helen that are important slow points of the scene before the jolting action takes over.
    You’re using Sgt Williams to pull threads together which is a clever way to do that.
    It was important to put in the deaths–they helped illustrate how bad the car chase was, bring up the moral quandary for Magera (and Benji) and because we can’t have everything work out when the stakes are so high at this point–it reminds us of how dangerous the situation still is.
    Really great scene!!

  7. Michael

    Awesome pacing with these two scenes – it’s like an action movie, skipping from scene to scene – all connected. Like the truck chase, felt crazy and out of control.
    Shame, three of them didn’t make it – must wonder if they would have chosen death over being some prize in a human trafficking business. Are they better off?
    I also liked the small touch with Roy and Helen, for a detective he sure is slow in picking up the signals. 😉
    Wondering why you call her “his assistant” instead of Helen?
    Sweet scene!

    1. Peggy (PJ) Rockey Post author

      I like your question about whether they would have chosen death over the life they were otherwise destined for; in one of my later scenes as Magera and Benji discuss whether they should blame themselves or not, they will ponder this very point.
      As for why he refers to Helen as his assistant, it was either me putting labels on people or it was him putting distance and detachment on the relationship. the former, I believe.

  8. Georgiana Nelsen

    Oh no! Those poor girls.
    Why does Magera blame herself though?? if not for her, they’d all still be captive, or worse.
    This was so well written–i literally was on the edge of my seat. I can picture the movie….:)
    Great scene Peggy.
    G

    1. Peggy (PJ) Rockey Post author

      Thanks, Georgiana! Magera and Benji likely feel responsible because they were the ones that hatched the plan. It’s irrational, in that the girls would have had a far worse fate had they not been rescued, but nonetheless, their actions specifically led to the deaths of these girls. I love your comment about picturing the movie!!!