snow birds by nsbnina

snow birds a flock of robins rock the park where mornings find us walking their dun-cherry vests puffed to impress they saunter while they’re talking we circle round this hallowed ground neath trees whose roots are tangled warmth is lost to that hoarfrost  that paints the leaves until they’re crisp and spangled soon enough winter’s...

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Susanne Bennett
Member
1 month ago

What a lovely poem – your descriptions make fall seem much nicer than it actually is! Great command of language!

June Hunter
Member
1 month ago

Ah, lovely Nina. From the very first line I was drawn into the rhythm and rhyme of this poem. You have so many beautiful images that I can’t pick a favourite. Well done!

Jane
Member
1 month ago

Hi Nina, a lovely poem. You say so much with so few words, and I love the shape you have created:)
And I was about to put my favourite lines in but I see they are exactly the same as Maria’s:) Loved them, so very very pretty.
Well done and thanks for sharing.

EDamonMitchell
Member
1 month ago

This is super lovely, Nina. The imagery, your word choices, outstanding. I am there, walking in the cold, seeing the robins strutting and chatting while everything else is quiet and still. I feel the crisp air. I see two people walking in silence, breathing in the time and place, and also, with a hint of sweet melancholy, looking toward the escape to warmer days. I love this. So well done.

Christian Donovan
Member
1 month ago

Hi Nina, You’ve given us another lovely poem drawn from nature. I like the sparse rhymes you use and the images are wonderful – the robins ‘rock the park’ and ‘send us also southward bound’.

Peggy
Member
1 month ago

Such lovely imagery, I could imagine myself strolling along, observing the birds, the tangled roots, and the changing colors. the rhythm and rhyming scheme are wonderful.

C Alexis
Member
1 month ago

Your poem reminds of stream of consciousness as expressed by a goose on wing south.

maria delaney
1 month ago

Beautiful. I adore pieces with the seasons weaved in every sentence. I enjoyed your piece very much!

My favorite lines;

warmth is lost to that hoarfrost 
that paints the leaves until they’re
crisp and spangled

Great job!