Scene 50 by Linda Sansalone

  • : Supernatural thriller
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Riana N
4 months ago

Hi Linda.
The death of Jenny was a big and very effective shock! Really unexpected, good surprise there! 😉
The only thing that bugged me a teeny bit about this scene is how unaffected Daniel and Kate seemed to be about Jenny’s death. I realise that they must have become a little numbed by all the horrible things they’ve experienced, and perhaps you are intentionally not trying to make the protagonist(s) likable, but them being “happy” and “very good” after they’ve spent a night in a house where somebody so kind had just been brutally murdered seems not quite natural. (Although, this is thriller and I’m not that familiar with the genre 😀 ).
I’m really excited to read your last two scenes! 😉

4 months ago

This was a good recovery scene mixed with a last surprise it seemed. I am sad for Jenny, but happy that David and Kate seemed to finally get a chance to breathe and what better way than looking forward to the future again! Very lovely scene!

5 months ago

Hi Linda

Good progress in this scene, from the murder to the passion, it covers quitea few emotions. I like how you tell the story through the dialogue and the pace is well maintained too.

A good scene to read, with still a few unanswered questions as we draw towards the end of the 52.