• Hi Candice,
    Thanks so much for your feedback. Much appreciated.

  • Hi Susan,
    As always I admire your writing and value your comments. I was so stuck with this prompt, thinking only politics which bores me to tears. Once I decided on the topic, I felt I was there. Thanks for your feedback.

  • Hi Deryn,
    Thankfully we did not go through it, but I was impacted by Ash Wednesday years ago. We have bushfires every summer but this year the scope and ferocity has been very different. Thanks for your comments.

  • Hi Susan,
    This is absolutely brilliant. You had me enthralled, entertained and in awe from the first word to the last. Congratulations.

  • Hi Catherine,
    I really liked your take on this very tricky prompt – the coalition of ladies in pink who look after the kids and each other. I thought the ending was particularly strong: “By mid-afternoon, the Pink Ladies would switch off the lights, lock up, say their goodbyes, and return home to the reality of their individual lives. Reliably,…[Read more]

  • Hi Deryn,
    I enjoyed your story and I thought it worked as a stand-alone, but I did agree that there could have been a little showing versus telling. Overall, well done.

  • Hi Bhavna,
    I really enjoyed this story. The idea of the crossroads in the first two sentences sparked my interest and you kept me enthralled. Even though I knew what was happening with the mention of Sun City, I wanted to keep reading. The plot was really well executed. Well done.

  • Photo by Dawn Armfield on Unsplash

    They say it is dead quiet in the eye of a tornado or hurricane. And other unimaginable storms. And, so we found it. An eerie, uneasy stillness enveloped the paddocks as we wa […]

    • Deryn replied 3 weeks ago

      Judy this is soooo powerful and left me with a lump in my throat. I don’t know if you experienced this but we all saw the photos and reports of the bush fires, so I hope that not too much of this is personal experience. Either way, the writing is so graphic, so searing that I felt the heat. Really evocative, and so well done. Wow.

    • Judy replied 3 weeks ago

      Hi Deryn,
      Thankfully we did not go through it, but I was impacted by Ash Wednesday years ago. We have bushfires every summer but this year the scope and ferocity has been very different. Thanks for your comments.

    • Judy – this is powerful stuff, I was right there beside the men, and I think your use of short sentences, like ‘Watch. Spot. Bucket. Refill. Maybe that happens when you know you are going to die. Go through the drill. Dodge the bullets and don’t think about the bomb about to fall on you.’ was the key to this. Likening the situation to a war added to your imagery (advance attack, sherman tank, battlefield etc) and the way you set the scene and built to the crisis was masterly. Your sensory details – the heat of the doorknob and ‘face … like a scalded tomato’ was really powerful. Excellent use of the prompt and of course, hugely (and sadly) topical.

    • Hi Susan,
      As always I admire your writing and value your comments. I was so stuck with this prompt, thinking only politics which bores me to tears. Once I decided on the topic, I felt I was there. Thanks for your feedback.

    • This story left me with tears in my eyes. So sad, but so well written. I also had to google ‘ute’ – never heard that before.

    • Hi Candice,
      Thanks so much for your feedback. Much appreciated.

  • Hi Kim,
    Sorry to be so slow on the uptake, but have just realised that you have set yourself the daunting and additional challenge of incorporating the prompts into chapters or scenes of a longer piece of fiction. When I’m relaxing at the beach in a week’s time, I intend to read all of your posts in sequential order. I am super impressed, as I…[Read more]

  • Hi Kim,
    Your comments are as ever thoughtful and generous. I did set myself two goals when I joined at the start of the year – to complete 12 stories and to try a range of genres. I thought I was going to fall short because I really couldn’t get an idea for this prompt and was tempted not to try to write one. Best wishes for Christmas and look…[Read more]

  • Thanks for your lovely comments Cheryl.

  • Hi Deryn,
    You nailed it. A perfect story. Cannot offer any suggestions as it’s just so good,

  • Hi Cheryl,
    I agree with both Audra and Susan. This is a great story and it’s so easy to get conflicted with tenses and well worth a specific reread for that alone. I love that you found a really inventive use of the prompt. Well done.

  • Hi Susan,
    I really liked your story. I found the prompt really difficult to deal with aside from relationship issue and you have a great unique slant. Well written

  • Hi Martin, I really liked this story – so much going on. Your dialogue was seamless – so natural. The ending was strong, rounding it off nicely. Well done.

  • Hi Stephen,
    I liked your story and the ending was neat and appropriate. Good use of the prompt.

  • Hi AshMK,
    I really enjoyed your story. It had me enthralled from the beginning but I felt the ending let it down a little. It just needed to be a bit stronger. Well written overall.

  • Thanks anjum. I wanted to try something a bit different. I found it really hard to find something to fit the prompt which wasn’t just a boyfriend.

  • The old woman frowned in concentration as she set the heavy bowl on the table. It was filled almost to the brim and water sloshed drunkenly.

    My throat tightened. “This is not my type of thing, Morwenna. I d […]

    • Strange but deeply engrossing .Liked its mysterious nature.

    • Thanks anjum. I wanted to try something a bit different. I found it really hard to find something to fit the prompt which wasn’t just a boyfriend.

    • Hi Judy
      This isn’t usually my genre of fiction, but it was strangely compelling, I think because the weather is such a powerful force of nature. The special gift that she has didn’t seem far fetched and the descriptions just carried me along. It was very lyrical and visual, I really liked it, well done.

    • Hi Judy – that was amazing well written, I could feel it all through your descriptions, for example ‘A great gash of lightning streaked across the sky. Thunder exploded directly overhead.’ Really lively language and tempo – just terrific. And a great ending. Powerful stuff, I loved it.

    • Hi Judy, I loved your story. It had me hooked from the very start and kept me enthralled all the way through. I loved the storm powers you gave to the MC, and they way you showed how she controlled them and described the potential issues that came from misuse. I loved the twist you gave at the end, so sad and yet so powerful, leaving my imagination to run wild with questions and possibilities. Your writing is powerful and alluring. Well done!

    • May I gush? I was enthralled with the telling of your tale. Your descriptors were spot on and carried the story in the momentum of the storm gales. I’m a very visual person and it all came to life for me and made the mere 1200 words seem vastly longer…so sad it had to end. Superb writing!

    • Thanks for your lovely comments Cheryl.

    • Kim replied 2 months ago

      have to agree with Peggy and Cheryl – I was totally mesmerized by this tale – found I wanted more – so how does this vision change things for her younger self? so many questions and not enough story to read it out.
      hope at some point you will continue with this – it would be a shame to just leave it here.

      wonderfully evocative, loved your phrasing with regards to weaving the wind with her fingers – yes lyrical is the right choice to describe your style in this.

      you have shown a wide range in your storytelling this year Judy – and you never disappoint, no matter what you try. Thank you for providing some wonderful reading entertainment Judy!

    • Hi Kim,
      Your comments are as ever thoughtful and generous. I did set myself two goals when I joined at the start of the year – to complete 12 stories and to try a range of genres. I thought I was going to fall short because I really couldn’t get an idea for this prompt and was tempted not to try to write one. Best wishes for Christmas and look forward to sharing our stories next year.

    • I would read more.
      Good description: I could picture the setting, the characters. Dark, disturbing — but I like that.

  • Hi Martin,
    This story has always stuck in my mind. When we visited the battlefields of Northern France, I imagined it happening, along with all the dreadful things. Thanks for your feedback.

  • Load More

Judy

Profile picture of Judy

@velveteen-rabbit

active 1 week, 1 day ago