A far cry from the usual seasonal saccharine. As a card-carrying member of the Clynics’ club, I applaud your trashed Christmas. And as a widowed pensioner, living alone, this is a fair approximation of the way I spend Christmas. Quiet. Peaceful. Solvent. Relaxed. Enjoying my solitary dinner, and a glass or three of my favourite wine, whilst listening to my favourite music. Thanks for making my reading day.

I love this. My friend Moon McFarlane has set you on the path to your true calling. Here’s to Russian Routette Dinners and wrecking so-called Christmas in style.

A thoroughly delightful story….probably the dream of more people than you imagine.
There have been times when I decided to nix the idea of the ‘traditional’ holiday.
While a few askance eyebrows were raised, I smiled and went on enjoying the non-traditional dinner (with far less cholesterol and sugar) and after everyone went home….I laughed and applauded myself at my daring!
I think you covered each and every ‘tradition’ well….and perhaps, maybe, you are starting a new tradition.
Your writing was entertaining and totally relatable.
My only hesitation is….the children….what will they remember?
Perhaps a modern woman who dares to be different?
You can always roast a turkey for Sunday dinner.
Every now and then we do need a ‘breather’ and of course, it is vitally important to think about the real reason for the season.

Hi Susanne, I agree with Nina, this has some of the same Moon McFarlane sass. Well done! I would’ve experimented with 2nd person, after Mia’s class, too, if I didn’t already have something half-baked. Maybe for January. I think you could improve upon this by cutting out the we/us references (“Let’s”–for example), those place us back in 1st person, but other than that I think this piece of writing was perfect for 2nd person. I call it a success! I wish I could join with the no-presents idea. Gifts are definitely not my love language (giving or receiving). Happy Holidays to you and yours!

I really enjoyed your story Susanne. This was perfect for this time of year. I can certainly relate to wanting to ditch all the hype and enjoy a quiet holiday without frantic preparations. I liked that you took each tradition and skewered it. I do think it was reminiscent of Moon – the getting down to business approach. Very fun read!

Hi Susanne,
I’m excited to see what Lilli’s students have planned! I like the playful banter between the couple.
I like Lilli’s reflection on hair and makeup, it’s a good complement to her homemade dress. I wonder if some of those thoughts could go into a conversation with her sister or best friend?
I have a thought–I wonder if you want to develop Bad Glauburg a bit more in the rewrite? I know you’ve mentioned it many times–and maybe you’ve given us more history and visuals of the city and I’ve missed it, but now I see it plays an important part in the story.
Is wedding cake traditional for them as well? Just wondering if the guests will want it after all those yummy desserts!

Great reflective piece, Susanne! Showing Lilli noticing the world anew makes me feel her relief.
Here are a couple things to consider for the rewrite:
–I assume she was so happy that she decided to call her sister, but I wonder if stopping at a coffee shop was also a rare treat for her, or was it merely an opportunity for her to make the call?
–does anyone notice her drum roll, or is the coffee shop deserted?
–does she roll the name Tinner around in her head when her students call her that? Thinking about how soon they will be calling her Mrs. Miller instead?
And I’m glad she chose Tinner. This seems like the moment we’ve been waiting for in this story–Lilli’s happily ever after.
Now I am eager to see if Danielle makes it to the wedding, and what surprise Anne has planned for her sister.
This is the third time in a week I’ve heard about America’s tacky/over-the-top reputation 🙂
Great job, Susanne.

Hi Susanne, I’m so glad Lilli has decided to both post the letter and chosen which name she’s going to take. You’ve described that feeling when you start the day on a positive so well, when the whole world takes that light, happy feel, I really enjoyed that entire part.
I only have a couple of tiny suggestions. I got a little confused by the lid of the mailbox shutting right at the start. I really loved the detail and I first took it as the lid of the mailbox shutting as she was posting the letter to her dad but then realised, it couldn’t be because she hadn’t left the flat yet. Was it the postman delivering post and waking her up? I’m so sorry if I missed something.
The other one is about Anne’s reaction. You indicate her voice was disappointed and angry. Disappointed, I can completely understand, but personally, I thought angry seemed a little strong when Lilli had made such a good argument as to why she chose the name and Anne has been so supportive so far. As I said, it could just be me, it just stuck out a bit. I did love this so much: “I need to shed my old name. It’s like skin I have outgrown.”
Looking forward to the wedding now! 🙂

Hi Susanne – I loved the paragraph when Lilli catches sight of herself in the shop window, her coat tails flying – lovely imagery and am so happy her sense of confusion about her name, her father etc has receded leaving place for joy in the run up to her wedding, which of course we’re all looking forward to!!

Hi Susanne, hurrah, she’s posted the letter! Good for her! Now, I just hope she can truly let go of her dad and her expectations of him in her mind too. 🙂
One tiny suggestion if you don’t mind. At the beginning of the scene, you’re telling us about Lilli telling John about her decision. I think it would be more impactful if we could read the actual dialogue they have from the start. Hearing Lilli’s words too would immerse us straight inside the conversation before hearing his response.
It’s interesting that John felt so strongly about Godfrey but didn’t say anything before but I’m glad he is so supportive. It’s taken Lilli a long time to break free from her Dad but at least she’s chosen a partner who appears to be the complete opposite of her Dad. Six to go! 🙂

Great scene, Susanne! We get Lilli smashing the compass, that’s a big moment for the story. I like how you let her remain sleeping, and drift into another dream that would start the healing process. This isn’t going to be an easy journey for her.
We also get to hear John talk more than he’s ever talked before. If you wanted to make him into a more complex character, you could have Lilli get annoyed by him (or vice versa). Not necessarily in this scene specifically. But I also see the value in keeping him a quiet, compassionate non-controversial character, too.
One suggestion to consider, make it apparent when Lilli starts talking about the letter that she is still dreaming/remembering and this is her letter as a child. Also, is there a chance that Godfrey never got the letter from 12-year old Lilli? If not, show us how we know he saw the letter (Lilli’s half sister mentioned seeing the envelope in the mail? Something else?)
Another suggestion, how does Lilli feel after seeing her mom in the dream/memory?
Well done!

Hi Susanne – Lilli is resolute – sounds as if she has always been like that even since she was 12. This recent interaction with Godfrey must merely have cemented what she already knew about him. Now she has John, she can let her father go. Let’s see how he responds – if indeed he responds, to this, her 2nd letter.