So this story so definitely an example of an unreliable narrator. And good one at that. I like the character too. Did he do it though?

What an interesting breed! Big strong cattle dog and a lean running machine Whippet. Very delightful read and great attention to detail which puts the reader on the farm with you.

I love these questions. They’re definitely guiding me to discover more about this story and characters. I will definitely use them in my ideation!

The use of present tense here is so effective -very well executed. The subject matter is clearly something you know about first hand or your research is on point. What I liked about it is that I learnt a lot about diving without reading a textbook. So you really struck the nail on the head with the age old conundrum that writers face when having…[Read more]

I loved this story. Rich in culture, character and emotion. The ending should change in my opinion. It shouldn’t end with Bozhana. Sophia is our protagonist, so it should end with her. You have very colourful story here.

Gripping stuff! What a surprise when she hit him over the head, loved it! My suggestion would be to mention the shard of glass earlier, otherwise it feels a bit random. It doesn’t take away from the suspense though. Mentioning the prop earlier will just reinforce its significance. Great job on defining Rachel and the situation. It is difficult to…[Read more]

This was interesting! Maybe you can give us more about Clara and her mother’s adventures. I liked the time jumps. This one can be expanded into a novella.

I loved the twist. Also the narrator’s non-chalant attitude was very genuine.

Wow, well done for a first draft. Your story is there and very well refined already. I love the narrator. This is a winner. A bit more spotlight on the siblings with the dystrophy might provide more focus to the central themes I think. Maybe also showing us a bit more of that disdain the mother had towards the sister in law (loved that by the…[Read more]

Thank you very much. I am glad you enjoyed it!

Thank you! I am glad you enjoyed it!

Thank you for this great comment! I love to hear that people enjoyed it ☺️

Very touching. The structure works perfectly to deliver the message.

There is some very deep in emotions here. You can definitely explore them and the enthralling character of Thomasina in a novel.

Great idea. Feels like a good start to a crazy journey for such a young man.

I enjoyed the story. Charming character with a easy and flowing narration.

Very mythical. I liked playing around in this world of fairies.