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  • Hi Peggy,
    I do love a fairy tale mingle. It was very deftly done and made for an enjoyable read. Thank you for sharing and all best wishes for your entry in this competition.

  • Hi Peggy,
    Thanks for your lovely comments. I’m so glad you liked my edited version better. It took a bit of work but I think was worth it.

  • Hi, Nicole,
    Some beautiful descriptive passages, giving a real sense of the story. I loved it. It was self-contained and was a lovely plotline – no flagging. Thanks for a great read.

  • Thank yu Nicole,
    Your kind words makes me think it was worth the editing – never an easy process.

  • Oh Anne,
    What can I say?? Well, thank you for your lovely comments. The comments that you have made over these past few months have been instrumental in building up my (very fragile) confidence💖. You, as well as some others that have made a point of reading my work have encouraged me to write more science fiction and to claim it as my genre to…[Read more]

  • Hi Susan,
    And now I’ve read your December story:-) What a read. You have a deft touch. The story kept its momentum throughout. I loved the humour of it as well. Actually can’t think of anything to find fault with. Thanks for a read that made me smile (a lot).

  • Hi Anne,
    Great story🤩You seem to work at your best under pressure. The dialogue was snappy and held everything together. I wanted MORE! Well done. You kept me captivated.

  • Hi Jane,
    I’m so pleased you enjoyed this story and you ‘got it’. I had one of these what if? moments on face creams, probably saw one too many adverts:-). Yes, I too think the second part could do with more work. I do intend to develop it. As someone else said ‘it has legs’. Thanks for reading it.

  • Thank you, Marilyn, for your lovely comments. I enjoyed writing it. The subject has been on my mind for a while now. It was a relief to get it into print.

  • I’m not doing 52 scenes. I’ve a bit too much going on (hubby’s operation is on the 16th and I have two draft novels crying out to be edited). I definitely wouldn’t keep up. Lovely to ‘hear’ from you 😍😍

  • Hi Cheryl,
    What a wonderful episode! I’m liking Razorre more and more. Loved the twist at the end. Dragons are such sinuous beast in tongue as well as physique😊

  • Hi Susan,
    Gosh, that story went by quickly. I found it very funny and a good read. Thanks for leaving me with a smile on my face.

  • Wow! Barbara, what a clever story. I was captivated by the theme and the poignancy of the ending. I am struggling to think of any negatives or anything that I could suggest to improve it, but you’ve hit the nail. It a brilliant story and I loved it. 🤩🌲Season’s greetings to you.

  • Hi Susan,
    Thank you for taking the time to read this and for your excellent comments. I shall definitely be working further on this idea.

  • Hi Barbara,
    Thank you for taking the time to comment on my story. I agree with the points you raised. This idea has been at work in my head for a while and I didn’t realise until I started writing (late as always!) how it was going to develop. I will be working on this over the Christmas period as I think it worthy of a slightly longer story.…[Read more]

  • Hi Seyi,
    Thank you for your kind comments. This is an idea that has been wandering around in my head for a while now. It’s nice to get it down as a story. I will agree that it did seem a bit rushed at the end. I would like to develop it into a longer story. I had so much more I wanted to say. Maybe it will continue next year. I will have to see. I…[Read more]

  • More Than Skin Deep by Maria Kinnersley

    #

    Dinah bustled around. Must audit the stock she thought and get these shelves filled up before we close. She glanced at her fellow worker with a slight frown. Anna stood […]

    • Maria, this is VERY creepy (and good.) I think it feels a little like a story in two halves: the excellent build up and mystery and the rather fast conclusion after Dinah and Steve went to find out what was happening. Perhaps you could have hinted at what was going on, leaving us to wonder about things, rather than spell it out quite so clearly. I thought the description of Anna changing over time was particularly good at foreshadowing something ominous was on the cards. Great tension.

      • Hi Susan,
        Thank you for taking the time to read this and for your excellent comments. I shall definitely be working further on this idea.

    • A chilling concept and judging by how the great and the good were suckered in, likely to work. Did men find it as attractive as well, I wonder? If I had a suggestion for an improvement it would be more variation of pace. So, some of the more ordinary details could be summarised to give more words to emphasise developing the thread of Anna, for example, or more emphasis on the suppressed enquiry. But I think it’s got lots of promise as an idea. Very creative!

      • Hi Barbara,
        Thank you for taking the time to comment on my story. I agree with the points you raised. This idea has been at work in my head for a while and I didn’t realise until I started writing (late as always!) how it was going to develop. I will be working on this over the Christmas period as I think it worthy of a slightly longer story. Appreciate your suggestions.

    • Hey again Maria and how goes it? I like the story line (I’m a sucker for fantasy-based stories, and with a bit of sci-fi mixed in, I look no further.) The dialogue and character development in the first ‘half’ of your story are excellent but I tend to agree that things seem a bit rushed toward the end. I’m not sure if you are planning to continue this story but you have left yourself plenty of leeway to do this. I hope you do, it feels like it has legs. All the best and regards, Seyi

      • Hi Seyi,
        Thank you for your kind comments. This is an idea that has been wandering around in my head for a while now. It’s nice to get it down as a story. I will agree that it did seem a bit rushed at the end. I would like to develop it into a longer story. I had so much more I wanted to say. Maybe it will continue next year. I will have to see. I appreciate you taking the time to read this.

    • Oh. My. Goodness. This was GOOD!
      Lots of thoughts going through my mind right now.
      Perfect blend of suspense….and fright!
      You fit a lot into this story and I hope you continue it.
      I can see this being a story with more episodes!
      I did enjoy reading it!!!!

      • Thank you, Marilyn, for your lovely comments. I enjoyed writing it. The subject has been on my mind for a while now. It was a relief to get it into print.

    • Hi Maria, I really enjoyed this creepy tale. I think it shows how obsessed we are as a race with looking good:) Turning back the clock and getting rid of wrinkles are such a big market that no-one was really too interested in following the story up. Or maybe the aliens killed the story. I agree with some of the comments that there could have been a bit more emphasis on the second part with the aliens etc building it up a bit more.
      But I understand with the word count that can be hard.
      Well done and thanks for sharing.

      • Hi Jane,
        I’m so pleased you enjoyed this story and you ‘got it’. I had one of these what if? moments on face creams, probably saw one too many adverts:-). Yes, I too think the second part could do with more work. I do intend to develop it. As someone else said ‘it has legs’. Thanks for reading it.

    • Hi Maria,

      I don’t know how you do it, my friend, but you got me yet again! I thought I kind of understand your story plotting by now, but you never fail to surprise me. I did think this might be an alien formula, however, the taking over plot twist didn’t even occur to me! What a scary thought this is but sadly, hits close to home about how people are willing to go to any lengths to cling to their youth.

      In this last one of the year, I want to tell you how much your words have helped me cope with the harsh realities of life and how much I cherish your friendship. Virtual hugs and lots of prayers and healing thoughts for you and Mr. Kinnersley.

      Love,

      Anne. xo

      • Oh Anne,
        What can I say?? Well, thank you for your lovely comments. The comments that you have made over these past few months have been instrumental in building up my (very fragile) confidence💖. You, as well as some others that have made a point of reading my work have encouraged me to write more science fiction and to claim it as my genre to work on. Believe it or not, I look forward to your comments, whenever they arrive. And I will keep my promise about ‘To Save the World’. When I have completed it, you will get first dibs on reading it.
        Alan, my hubby, will be going into hospital in just over a week’s time to have part of his lung removed, so your prayers at this time are very opportune. I don’t know whether you celebrate Christmas but I offer the best and loveliest greetings of the season and hope that you will stay with this group in 2021 xx. Meeting you here has been a highlight of this year.

  • Hi Jane,
    This was a really good piece of work. Having read all the episodes, it was fascinating to see within this work loose ends being tied up. I do have some comments which might make this even better. Some of us humble mortals may not know what a ‘ute’ is. I myself had to look this up. It is not a term in common usage in the UK as far as I am…[Read more]

  • Hi Seyi,
    Hope you are well.
    What a dark piece to end the year with:-) It drew me in and I was enthralled by this poor boy and the bullying that takes place together with the fact that being clever isn’t always a good thing. I enjoyed the read. Thanks for an interesting read. Your work always has an interesting cultural dimension.

  • Hi Christy,
    This is a very powerful story and had me gripped from start to finished. I agree with Mustang and her comments that when Jesus died on the cross, he defeated the devil. And you did raise a chill when talking at the end about a face-off between the Archangel Gabriel and the Devil.
    Getting back to the mechanics of your story. I’m…[Read more]

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Maria Kinnersley

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@marialynch

Active 1 week, 1 day ago
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