The pace, alliteration and rhythm is wonderful. The stream of consciousness approach works incredibly well.
Would it work if you didn’t repeat the word ‘quiet’? So that instead of being another word in the relentless battle, it becomes a very brief moment of stillness … before it all works itself up into a frenzy again?
You’ve capture the…[Read more]

I, too, had a stint in teaching.
Only I never had the ‘one who studied’. Ever. 🙂
The tedium of marking should attract payday bonuses, for the sake of mental health.
Thanks for a well-written read.

I really love this piece. Your lack of punctuation is so clever in the way that it reinforces the banalities and empty promises, as we sometimes utter them. My favourite read so far this month! Thank you for giving me joy.

This is powerful and your tight writing cleverly supports the theme.
These lines jarred me:
She fills the air
With gulps of screams.

It seems paradoxical/contradictory because gulping is an inward motion, so it can’t fill an outer space. Perhaps ‘she fills her lungs’ might work?
I can feel your passion in this piece.

I love how you’ve used rhythm and predictability, to underline the woefulness of that same humdrum existence.
The pacing is really good. I hope this isn’t true to life: if it is – here’s a hug and a cheerleading scream of encouragement to rush out, do something wild, and break that cycle. !

I love your gentle, caring observations. Some of the most profound aspects of nature are in its simplicity – and you’ve captured it well.

I love the wistfulness of this work.
You and I were in the same headspace this month, because my work deals with dogs, too.

THanks for the read, Sue.

I sent the boy my poem.
He laughed, but didn’t tell me if he still says ‘Bowel’. 😏

Thanks for your feedback. I appreciate every visit.

PS. May I share this on a Facebook poetry page?

Ooh. I really loved this. I wonder if non- South Africans will feel the same moment of recognition when we see her resilience and flexible approach to ‘what is’. The best thing is that I have (virtually) met someone who shares my thoughts! Phone lines are so much more beautiful when they’re not covered in black pvc and floating above our heads.

‘Was made of’ … a clever phrase to introduce the growth that follows destruction. I liked your choice of ‘glazed white’, immediately alerting us to the artifice that rules so many of our actions and lives.
A thoughtful read. Thank you.

Clever mirroring of the moulding process of both clay and self. That’s exactly how I feel when I paint. A good take on the prompt.
I would relook the use of ‘I am at content’ – I assume it’s a typo.

A thoughtful piece. It certainly made me re-think my abhorrence of screen-starers. The pathos is gentle, the tone so forgiving. Thank you.

You captured the frenetic pace of lost keys (so familiar to me), incredibly well. I love how you make it clear that this isn’t the first time it has happened. And that wish to blame it on anyone but oneself.
Thanks for a fun read.

Ooh. This is a lovely piece of work. There’s nothing about it that I don’t love, including the gut punch and the hollow aftermath.
Please may I share this on a Facebook poetry page?

I feel rude and lazy for tossing it together at the last minute. I’ve forgiven myself, though.

I’ll be pleased if it makes someone smile.