• It Happened by JM Barrie

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    The young, Asian nurse walked into the hospital room. ‘Ah, Mrs Griffin, you are packed and ready.’

    ‘Elsie, how many times do I need to tell you to call me Julia?’ Griffin scolded […]

    • Hi John, so my favourites Bentley and Griffin are back again:) I felt nice and relaxed all the way through your story – thinking they were finally safe to move on with their lives and rebuild and repair. But then you had to go change it in the last few sentences….. Now I am worried for them again.
      Great writing John, can’t wait to read next month:)
      Thanks for sharing.

    • That was a great story, which started off with some seemingly innocent banter but ended on a sinister note. There are many unanswered questions, like who Grand Dragon is and why they want to eliminate the main characters and their families, but all in all an interesting story with good dialogue.

    • A realistic scene which flowed beautifully. Part of a larger story I’m sure, and a very interesting segment at that. An enjoyable read. Great writing. Thanks for sharing.

  • Thank you, Seyi. It’s true, this is a set of characters and a storyline i’ve developed over the last few years, and I enjoy writing for them. You’re right, I’ve observed the animals for a while now and I’m pleased that is coming through as authenticity. I liked the smelly room too – trying to frame it from the animals perspectives with a younger…[Read more]

  • As is the older sister willing to take the knocks to protect her little sister. Wonderful and so sad at the same time

  • The conspiratorial understanding between mother and daughter is tragic and beautiful

  • I’m so sorry it’s taken me so long to read your story, but I’m so glad I read it in the end! What a gritty tale. Your situation was so realistic and the characters so believable, I almost could not bring myself to stop reading, despite the horror I feared to come, which you kept simmering just under the surface nicely. The ending was almost a…[Read more]

  • Hi Paul

    I was worried for a moment that Tom was making something a little more sinister than a Thor’s hammer replica, especially when you introduced the nails. A nice bit of misdirection to keep your readers on their toes. To then turn it into a symbol of empowerment was a fantastic touch. Good story, well done

  • I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to read this, I’ve been so busy of late, it’s crazy.

    I enjoyed your story. I hope it’s a step into a wider exploration of your imagination, inspiration, because it is so different from what you tend to share, and it is excellent! A few tense issues here and there, and spit sentences that should be one to read…[Read more]

  • Hi Seyi

    I’m so glad I found you and your stories, and this one is no different. Judging by the response it’s received, I’m not the only one!

    I was afraid that a story that had so little dialogue to break up the description would be hard to read, but yours was anything but. I think the deliberate extra spacing throughout which affected the…[Read more]

  • That’s all good Ben, thanks for clarifying! It might be a cultural thing as well, “pinched” might not work as well from an European perspective – a good reminder that words must be picked with care, thanks

  • Hi Paul

    Thanks for the repeated ‘his’ in the opening line – I missed that one altogether. The other two were problem sentences for me at the time of writing. It’s amazing though, how something that seems unsolvable when the deadline is looming, becomes such an easy fix when the dust settles.
    All the names in this story are real names for our…[Read more]

  • HI EDamonMitchell

    Thank you for your comments, I’m pleased you enjoyed the story. After writing a continuous action story through all of 2020, it was refreshing to revisit this universe and write something completely different from last year. I’m home a lot because of my health, so I can’t go out and study people, but watching the way the…[Read more]

  • Hi HM

    My wife has a theory that cats consider their owners two legged kittens, and are therefore their responsibility to look out for. It took Schlinky about 35 seconds to decide I was his the night my wife brought him home, and to this day, he will let me pat him harder and rougher than he ever allows my wife to. And yes, it was fascinating to…[Read more]

  • Hi Jane

    I’m pleased you enjoyed it. I always found some of the best fiction to have elements of reality interwoven in them. The great thing about having the bad back and mobility issues I have means it is a torturous effort to pick up anything off the floor. Which leaves only one other person to deal with Schlinky’s leftovers 🙂

  • Hi Cristy

    Thank you for your comments. These are characters I’ve been developing over the last few years, so there are a few assumptions taken from those established parameters. The basic premise was what if we hadn’t waited for the old cat to pass before we got a new kitten? What if the older cat had the opportunity to teach the kitten how to…[Read more]

  • Hi Susan

    No red pen – woohoo! Off to a good start for the year 🙂
    One of the origins of this story was noticing when I was really sick in the second half of last year, that Schlinky was bringing his kills in as normal, but instead of leaving the leftovers in Jill’s bed or something, he was leaving them close to where I spent most of my time.…[Read more]

  • Hi Ben

    I’m pleased you enjoyed it. Working on the notion that Dad belongs to Schlinky and not the other way round, I wanted to throw a different spin on the human assumption that he is just being bad by stealing the food off the table. From Schlinky’s perspective, why might it not be an attempt to ascertain the quality of Dad’s meal to satisfy…[Read more]

  • What an imaginative and interesting take on the prompt. Apart from a few minor typos, I enjoyed this a lot, and found the various twists and turns terrific.
    Well done, thank you for sharing

  • I loved your MC’s determination to succeed, always focused on the goal, despite the mundane things she had to do – she was so relatable. You captured the no-win scenario well, and her reaction at the end was totally in character.

    Some stories that have little or no dialogue fall into the trap of being too heavy on description to the detriment…[Read more]

  • I enjoyed this excellent story, so realistic and believable. So many people can relate to elements of this, whether it is happening to someone they love, or to themselves. I know the frustration of not being able to do more and more of the things you once took for granted, and this comes across wonderfully. Your dialogue is excellent too. The…[Read more]

  • Hi Jacquline

    This is, certainly, a powerful story about a difficult subject to discuss, Your MC’s voice is strong, and her determination to build the house/life she wants is equally so. Her reaction to the stalker walking around her house is so realistic, and the genuine fear is real.

    I did spot a couple of small errors. In “4 months…[Read more]

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JM Barrie

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