fbpx
  • Trudi is my name and I am a dog.

    Every year my human family thinks it’s funny to allow me to choose the holiday destination. To do this they place 4 very large and thick holiday destination brochures in front o […]

    • Holidays are precious,when many get them they should be fully enjoyed and remembered

    • I really enjoyed reading this. So clever and funny! Perfect characterisations of the the dog and cat. Thank you for adding some extra cheer to my day.

    • Hi Christopher– this was adorable. I think you captured both the dog’s and cat’s voices very well (and I should know; I have one of each). Thanks for the chuckle.

    • Oh this is just lovely! A wonderful idea very well executed – well done!

  • I lie paralysed, it’s pitch black, my whole body including my face is covered in a thick black veil of evil. I can just about breathe, and when I open my mouth to scream or shout the black veil pours into me l […]

    • Your description of your MC trying to survive the unsurvivable is captivating. I was intrigued by the angel beating the evil and then kissing the MC’s hurts away. A warrior and caretaker in one. Well done.

    • Vivid description had my pulse racing and I enjoyed where it went.

      Thanks for sharing.

    • A beautiful story with a poignant narrative. It also reinforces the faith that angels do exist and when you pray, they appear in some form to pull you out of the depths of despair.

  • You certainly took the blue to every element of your story well done.

  • I wake up laying on a paddling board in the bloody sea, I can’t remember how I got here and I am so far away from the shore that I am suddenly very scared. The seawater is warm and dark blue. A pod of dolphins i […]

    • So this story so definitely an example of an unreliable narrator. And good one at that. I like the character too. Did he do it though?

    • I struggled to know what was real and what was dream – and I think the narrator did too! There was a sense of reality within reality. Why did he taste of salt and crave a tuna sandwich – had he become a dolphin? I get the feeling this is part of a larger piece. I’d like to know more!

    • I like the image of the dolphins playing with him in his dream. I didn’t understand the reference to the tuna sandwich. I thought you did a great job of the transition from his dream to waking up. Thank you for an entertaining read.

  • Thailand, the home of the Buddha, a place full of beauty and natural drama, the land of happy people, spicy food, and Temples. This was our second day in Thailand and the itinerary said we were going to the […]

    • I wish this were a memoir. Nicely done. Very convincing. Namaste.

    • That feeling of flying… your descriptions are clear and engaging, painting pictures in my mind.

      Thanks for sharing.

    • Hi Christopher. Although you say this is friction, I could easily see it as your spiritual journey where the premise is God is Love. He is not to be feared and once you surrender, you will experience boundless joy in this vast universe of His creation. It’s attachment that will keep you here and detachment that will set you free. Nice take on the prompt and I felt transported into your MC’s journey. Thank you.

  • Great story and had me enthralled, with an ending I was not expecting , brilliant.

  • Great story you had me hooked – bit of a typo at the beginning .Thanks

  • It is a glorious Sunday morning and I am walking down Hammersmith High street to the launderette, yes it’s such a glamorous life for a rich (but can’t spend it, can’t show it, can’t even look at it) excon. […]

    • Your word choices were spot on and added so much to the realism of this encounter. Nicely done.

    • After I got use to the English idioms, I am American I enjoyed the story. I like how Dave gave himself away in the end.
      Very good story.

    • I enjoyed the colloquial style, and there was something clipped about it. The speech allowed me to read fast, like people would speak and I could imagine what they sounded like. There was a really nice balance between the progress of the story and a little edge of hysteria which made it almost satirical. I thought it was a neat style.

      I particularly liked the line: ‘like a dog on a trip to the seaside’
      I think there is a speech mark missing in this line: ‘“Ok then boys you have me bang to rights, so here, have a look inside that beauty, and I threw the bag at big Barry.’
      I think this is a typo: ‘you didn’t as its personnel.”’ personal?
      At the beginning I found it a little difficult to get into the flow, I think because of the gerunds e.g. ‘I am walking’, for me using the active ‘I walk’ would make it seem more immediate and give it a little more drama perhaps. However, after the first couple of paragraphs the style really got going and worked well so it was only at the beginning.
      The switch from Frank’s perspective to the police perspective worked really well, although it went from 1st person present to 3rd person present, which can be confusing, your text flowed and was really clear.

      I thought your characterisation, and vibrancy of the setting really shone through. Frank is really quite slimy!

  • “Dave it’s midnight, in your fucking allotment both holding spades, what the fuck are we doing?”

    “Well Frank it’s pretty bloody obvious isn’t it, it’s not like there wasn’t a clue in the words allotment and […]

    • Hi Christopher – well don’t they say you live by the sword, die by the sword?! This pair of likely lads clearly deserves each other. Funny story, I liked the image of the allotmenent by night. Maybe a little overuse of each other’s names in the dialogue and the last line could be a little punchier – maybe even leave off “I am cool’ and show him wielding that spade!! Nice job, though!

    • Hi Christopher

      Well this was edgy, humorous, and fits perfectly the word count. The story, without doubt, and fulfils the requirements of a short story to a ‘T’.

      I loved it!

      Martin

    • Quite amusing! The F words added to the tone that you were conveying, which was fantastic. Loved it!

  • This is now my 3rd day in the free after being released from prison. I have done my meet, my greet, and my drink until unconscious as is required by my peer group, friends, and family, and now I can start the most […]

    • Hi,
      I thoroughly enjoyed the read. My attention was captured from the start. The pace of the story was good, the MC was well described, the plot was intriguing. I will not be making any suggestions. Thank you for sharing.

    • Hi Christopher,
      A really intriguing story. I want to know more!

    • Hi Christopher.

      This was a good little read, full of character and intrigue, not to mention the good flow and tension build up too. I was a bit hampered by some inaccurate grammar and whilst I’m not the grammar police, an editing read through and adjust would not have gone amiss.

      I’m not sure if this fits into a bigger story, but the loose ends leave enough for further exploration.

      I enjoyed the story you put together here.

      Martin

  • Ted’s Greasy Spoon by Christopher Joyce

    #

    The day after a night on the piss can be a wasted day, a Zombie Day and I was feeling rough. However, I have a tried and tested procedure to recover quickly. A speedy […]

    • Good story Christopher. I enjoyed the sweet and unexpected ending. A mother’s love and care. Considering where he started the morning I was half expecting him to land up back in jail with a dead body being among those lying around.

      A few sentences felt a little long for me and could do with being broken up.

      I love the double meaning to this sentence:
      I had become a decent member of society again

      Well done and thanks for sharing.

    • Sue replied 8 months ago

      Thanks for a very entertaining and original take on the prompt!

    • This is a charming little story. The zipper incident and the dad’s comments at the end are very funny. Gives you the feeling that things will go on this way and everything will be all right.

  • Nice and easy does it, lovely.

  • Trousers By Christopher Joyce

    #

    Waking up I can do, it’s easy, everybody does it, you just open your eyes and Bam you are in the land of the living. This morning or whatever time it is, my Bam was a very l […]

    • Awesome read Chris 😁. Can definitely relate to the morning after hangover, lol.

    • Ah, the morning after the huge night before…The humour running through the story makes it a joy to read and easy to imagine. Thank you for sharing

    • Love the phrase “pebble-dashed with vomit”… what a way to describe blowing chunks as the Yanks say. Methinks the author has had an experience or two with copious consumption as the descriptions of the aftermath were spot on! Nice “happy ending”

    • I’m sure that I had a grimace on my face throughout the whole read. Really enjoyed reading this despite it stirring up my own horrid memories of the morning after, haha. Loved the descriptions! Thank you for sharing!

    • Seyi replied 8 months ago

      Hello Christopher and how goes it? That was a hilarious, though somewhat painful read. I laughed like mad when I figured out your narrator was referring to Mr. Shanks as his ‘new best friend.’ I wondered why you added ‘London in parentheses when describing the clean water? Perhaps you wanted to give a sense of location? I’m guessing the name ‘Greggs’ also is has some significance but I can’t figure that so do help me out? Really funny, well narrated. Thanks and best regards, Seyi

  • Sausage Rolls are made by Angels by Christopher Joyce

    #

    I stood outside the prison as a free man. I turned and looked back at the building that had held me, prisoner, for 8 years.  8 years of my life wasted, 8 […]

    • All he has to do is call his parole officer every other day and not make a mess in Nathan’s apartment (flat?). Why do I think that will be a problem?

    • Hi Christopher. This was an interesting read and you captured the viewpoint of a just-released prisoner really well. I enjoyed the details about what one notice’s on a first day out of prison, such as the dogs, the new slang and how obsessed everyone has become with their phones. Very perceptive and sharp! In general, the details you chose to include/describe were really fitting, such as the flakes of the sausage rolls and the donut smell on Sharon’s breath. You had some really great imagery too, such as the Guiness described as a “black dream.”
      I realise this is part of a bigger story, so it’s okay that I didn’t understand why he was in prison. Your story feels like it will work really well as a dramatized monologue.
      I thought the ending was a bit hanging in the air, but possibly it is just “to be continued?”
      You can perhaps touch up your punctuation somewhat – I know some feel that it doesn’t matter much, but for some readers it does have the possibility to feel sloppy and distract from the intended tone of the piece.

  • Wow thankyou so much your comment is appreciated.

  • Load More

Christopher Joyce

Profile picture of Christopher Joyce

@christopher-joyce

Active 5 days, 12 hours ago
Short Story : 0
Poetry : 0
52 Scenes 2022 : 0