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  • So glad you liked. Thanks

  • Glad you enjoyed it! My pieces are written specifically to puzzle the reader

  •             Oh no, this is so silly! Did anyone think for one instant that we could use the word  ‘tempted’ and not be tempted to write more than three hundred words?

    It’s always a temptation to write on and on […]

    • Thank you Arlene for this clever little piece about nothing but could be about so much depending on what it means to the individual reader. I have read it twice and the test is if your seven year old asks you “what was that about, what did it say?” I would have to answer Gee I’m not entirely sure love, think it was some sort of pun on “temptation”.

    • I love your original and quirky approach. Very clever to weave in this paradoxical and tempting challenge to read or not read your 300 words. Thank you!

  • It’s not that way. Really it isn’t. But everyone assumes, don’t they? Assumes that it’s this way or that, in or out, up or down. Even I may be inclined to think that way. This way or that. Don’t we all keep some […]

    • I would read your books.

    • Gold replied 9 months ago

      I feel like celebrating with you. You being you. You being free to fully express all of you. I am so glad to read your rant and I am cheering you from the sidelines. Never give up what you love. Stoke it, fire it up and let it burn brightly. It reminded me a little of Edna St Vincent Millay a poet who lived an extravagantly sensual life, and one of her poems came to mind.
      ‘My candle burns at both ends
      It will not last the night;
      But ah my foes, and oh, my friends-
      It gives a lovely light.’

    • Hi Arlene
      What a wonderful expression of yourself and your thoughts. Very refreshing and makes me want to hear more.

  • Arlene's profile was updated 9 months, 3 weeks ago

  • Riana,
    Thanks for the like. I do write fan fiction. To read more of my works go to archiveofourown.org and my user name is arlenejp

  • Life for me was always just a shade off. 

    Living with the knowledge of my deviation was a challenge–a challenge from a young age until now. 

    Where did it come from? 

    My father, who was an avid centrist, cl […]

    • Hi Arlene,
      Such a thought provoking story! The prose is vibrant and unexpectedly detailed. You describe things that most people don’t pay attention to. Stunning! I will have to read it a couple of times to fully appreciate the complexity and beauty. I love how the structure of your sentences (white space in between) creates a rhythm.
      I am captivated!

    • Hi Arlene

      This is a well-crafted story and I had to read it a couple of times to get closer to the context. I have to say it’s challenging read and not one for a run of the mill magazine, that’s for sure.

      Having said that, it is well written and intriguing.

      Martin

    • Hi Arlene, perhaps I’m misinterpreting this, but I thought this was a very delightful and intriguing piece of “fan fiction.” I loved it! I did feel perhaps you could’ve dropped just a few more small hints, for example saying what the initials on the drawer were.
      I like how you’ve focused on the personal family angle of the story.
      The final line was stunning, and although it was unexpected, it fit well as you’ve built in the necessary ties for in throughout the story. Well done! 😀

    • Riana,
      Thanks for the like. I do write fan fiction. To read more of my works go to archiveofourown.org and my user name is arlenejp

  • Arlene started taking the course 30 Days of Dialogue 12 months ago

  • Arlene started taking the course 52 Scenes 12 months ago

  • Loved your dialogue! To me the best way to get into a characters head is through their speaking, whether out loud or internal.

  • No matter how far down I dig, I still come up with–crap.

    You talk and talk, and while I concentrate on each word, each inflection, I still meet–bullshit.

    Down deep you go–dragging yourself into the mire, the […]

    • Arlene – Thanks for sharing your July submission, keep going! I liked the pace and visuals. I am unsure what happens next but you were able to paint a picture in a short word count! Feel free to critique my July submission, i’d love to hear what you have to say! Thanks! – Matt

    • Andie replied 1 year ago

      You mention that your genre is romance, but this little slice of life narrative had not hint of it. In fact, I could not make out what the genre was, or what it was about. Who is this character? What is all the angst about? Yes, you painted a picture, but in drab colours. Sorry, but it’s a miss from me: frankly , it’s not my plate of spaghetti.

    • Oh this is a really interesting take. The quiet strength of the main character is really well played although I like how this could be in a piece where the frenemy has done something unforgivable or whether we have an unreliable narrator. I would say that grammar wise there may be too many “-“, a semi-colon or comma might be nicer to break it up.

  • It was written at the last moment. But I might edit and continue this story. Thanks for the feedback

  • I don’t understand what has happened to us.

    It began when I had to work those long hours. Those hours left him adrift to find his own way. And he was never one to sit still long. To watch television or read a b […]

    • The idea of this is great, a game played in all seriousness.

      However, there were a few places where I got thrown out of the narrative e.g. “certificate?” every bone in me wanted to throttle him, too–to–.” Capitalise Every; what do you mean by too-to-?

      The tiny paragraphs made is sound stilted in my head as I read it, though it did add pace to the story, heightening tension. Perhaps a bit more of a mixture, with scene-setting and headspace having a more gentle pace and then ramping up the dialogue when it comes in – might enhance it.

      Just some ideas.

      I enjoyed it overall and thanks for sharing.

    • Nice turn of events with him becoming an investigator and not having an affair. This piece reads very much semi stream of consciousness, where we are inside the narrator’s head, following her thoughts and experiencing the world through her eyes. You painted a very accurate picture of a woman driven by her suspicions to spy on her husband, fearing the worst and never suspecting the truth. It could use a bit of smoothing with some of the transitions seeming too abrupt, but it’s a good story with a sturdy framework.

    • It was written at the last moment. But I might edit and continue this story. Thanks for the feedback

  • So glad you liked,

  • Say Anything by Arlene

    #

    The apartment was still. Not really. The tension was there, in the air, in the small spaces. 

    Thirty four days shy of a year and it was over.

    Even though we had thoroughly discussed […]

    • Hi Arlene

      I wondered what was going on here! The story managed to keep its mystery right to the end and had me curious to know what twist was coming, for it felt there was one. There’s a good pace to it and you managed to squeeze it into the word count too.

      Good job.

      Martin

    • Sometimes, I got lost what was happening. But the whole time I wondered what they are discussing, I was curious about the point. So vivid! I felt like I was in the room with them 🙂

    • So glad you liked,

  • Thanks for liking this short. Actually you are right. I did not finish that sentence.
    I write mainly fanfiction–male pairings. So you can imagine where this would go if I were to change to the other person.

  • The Sensitive One by Arlene

    #

    My first reaction was to scream, throw myself to the ground and beg. But not anymore. It’s time to pick up and dust off and get on with it.

     Get on with what? What is there to wi […]

    • As a sometimes sensitive over-thinker, there were parts I could relate to. Seems like the main character is torturing themselves though. And, in the end, so simple. Relationships are complicated. You definitely captured that. I did notice this sentence seems to be missing something: The place where we lived for those wonderful, frustrating, 

      Thanks for the story. Now I want to know his version.

      • Thanks for liking this short. Actually you are right. I did not finish that sentence.
        I write mainly fanfiction–male pairings. So you can imagine where this would go if I were to change to the other person.

    • Great realization. Interesting story .

    • I like the sparseness of this laid out as it is. Compelling and intriguing, a poetical monologue. A whole world revealed and not revealed.

    • Hello Arlene,
      It is great to what depth you were able to depict such conflicting feelings in a person with so little of a situation and what we know of it.
      It is an untipical for a romance story and you give a fresh point if view to it. I’d love to see a continuation. 🙂

    • Hi Arlene. Good job depicting the MC’s inner conflict. I also liked the ending, even though it leaves the MC still in the troubled relationship.

  • Very good. Sometimes a mothers love can be hurtful. Good writing. Good descriptions.

  • You have to realize the undertones that was going on. The music, the looks between the men, the innuendos.
    Thanks and maybe revisit the show.

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Arlene

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@arlene

Active 2 weeks, 1 day ago
Short Story : 10
Poetry : 0
52 Scenes 2022 : 0
52 Scenes : 0
Flash Fiction 2022s : 0
52 Scenes Rewrites : 0
Show, don't Tell June 2022's : 0
52 Scenes July2022 - June2023's : 0