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  • Thanks a lot for your warm reply. I still cannot concentrate propertly. I guess you’re right and time heals. Thanks a lot.

  • Ana commented on the post, The Parlor by Ana Diaz 1 month ago

    Thanks Georgiana, you’re so dear. My mom just passed a bit over a week ago, and we’re all struggling. Thanks for your kindness, words help me a lot.

  • Ana commented on the post, The Parlor by Ana Diaz 1 month ago

    Thanks a lot Adam. I love the fact that you felt connected to the boy. He’s the main character of the novel I’m writing, so there’s more of him coming soon. Your words are very encouraging!

  • Ana commented on the post, The Parlor by Ana Diaz 1 month ago

    Thank you so much Sharmayne, this means a lot

  • Ana commented on the post, The Parlor by Ana Diaz 1 month ago

    Thank you Georgia. Sorry for taking so long to reply, things went from bad to worse. I love your comments and they give me strength to keep writing.

  • Ana commented on the post, The Parlor by Ana Diaz 1 month ago

    Thank you so much June, your comment is very encouraging

  • Dear Seyi,
    thank you for your kind words. I believe my circumstances did show in this one because it turned out grimmer than I thought. Somehow sadness pushes through and writing is a good way to release tension as well.
    I really appreciate that you captured the nuances of the exchange and the seed of intergenerational trauma, because it’s a…[Read more]

  • Hi Sharmayne,
    I don’t have much time to read this month so I went for the stories that captivated me from the start, as yours has. It’s sad and beautifully written, and for some reason I kept picturing Elizabeth Taylor and Montgomery Cliff having this conversation. The entire piece has a classic Hollywood vibe, cinematic, golden and timeless. It…[Read more]

  • Hi Amrita,
    it’s very dear of you to come back after a migraine, I know how bad they can get… I appreciate your comments very much, life hasn’t been easy lately and I think I spilled a whole lot of that darkness on this one. I hope you feel better and thanks a lot for reading

  • Hey Georgiana,
    a very warming story. I love the opening about castaways. I wonder how Karen has ended up the way she has at only 28. The way you present their loneliness is very compassionate and respectful. I bet they enjoyed the rest of the evening 🙂 Merry Christmas to you!

  • Hi Susan,
    that’s a brilliant wrap-up for a highly suspenseful story. The frenzied rhythm is addictive, and the noir tone is right up my alley. Great one!

  • Hi Charles,
    it always happens to me that when reading your stories it feels like I’m hearing you telling them. That apparent simplicity is not easy to accomplish. It mixes the deepest sadness with humor and a humble and honest way of conveying it. I thought this was beautiful.

  • Thanks a lot Charles. I haven’t had the mind in the right place for writing recently, and this turned out way darker than I intended. But if it feels even slightly close to David Lynch I take that as a huge compliment 🙂 surrealism always helps!

  • Thanks a lot for reading, Anjum

  •  Car rides are a holiday thing, and were already a thing of the past by the time he was ten years old. Car rides he remembers, therefore, with a special kind of vividness.Beau didn’t want to go on this one th […]

    • Life is strange many a times one has to face strange happenings.One side of life depicted well.

    • Well written Ana. I enjoyed how you explored your MC’s narrative through his experience and memory. Your tale took dark turns where insanity and corruption bubbled beneath the surface – threatening to explode into violence. In some ways, your story reminded me of David Lynch’s movie “Blue Velvet.”

      • Thanks a lot Charles. I haven’t had the mind in the right place for writing recently, and this turned out way darker than I intended. But if it feels even slightly close to David Lynch I take that as a huge compliment 🙂 surrealism always helps!

    • Hi Ana,
      I had started to read your story earlier but an awful migraine pain got in the way. I am glad I made it finally. There was so much pain in this. I remember the first story I read of yours…from then to date, your capacity to get inside the human brain and experience their feelings simply amaze me. How do you make it so poignant and gritty every time? You will make for an amazing directrix if you ever consider that as a career option. I loved how you portrayed the boy’s thoughts, him being forced to ‘man up’ in the cruelest way possible. The end was heartbreaking. A poignant story! Thank you for sharing!

      • Hi Amrita,
        it’s very dear of you to come back after a migraine, I know how bad they can get… I appreciate your comments very much, life hasn’t been easy lately and I think I spilled a whole lot of that darkness on this one. I hope you feel better and thanks a lot for reading

    • Hey, again Ana and hope things get better soon. You’ve not allowed any of life’s pressures to affect your writing though, this tale took me into your main character’s head and you kept me there effortlessly. Reminds me how fertile a young male mind is, and how susceptible it is to the actions of male role models. The exchange in the car is positively painful as the lad tries and fails to please his father. The reason for the trip, the father’s coiled anger, and the sordid atmosphere at the parlor all seem to assure that this trauma is going to pass on a generation. I particularly enjoyed the internal monologue, and the descriptions of your narrator’s discomfort (‘…numbness is preferable to pins and needles’) says it all. I’m not sure you needed teh second part of your opening line (‘Car rides he remembers, therefore, with a special kind of vividness.’) It seems to dilute the effect of those opening words, somewhat. Well done with this, as with your other submissions. I look forward to more in 2022. Stay well and ‘aluta continua.’ Best regards, Seyi

      • Dear Seyi,
        thank you for your kind words. I believe my circumstances did show in this one because it turned out grimmer than I thought. Somehow sadness pushes through and writing is a good way to release tension as well.
        I really appreciate that you captured the nuances of the exchange and the seed of intergenerational trauma, because it’s a subject I’m deeply invested in these days for a longer project.
        Always a pleasure to read from you, thanks again and yes, Aluta continua ✊

    • Hey Ana, I always fascinated by father/son stories and this one is a cracker. I hope you keep working this as there is something really ethereal about the nature of this boy that I love. I want to know more about him, go deeper into this stifling relationship with his father and find out how it impacts him with friendships, school or other parts of his world. And the idea that he keeps being made to come back to this place would create this suffocating circular spiral that holds so much potential for a longer piece. Well done and thanks for sharing.

      • Ana replied 1 month ago

        Thanks a lot Adam. I love the fact that you felt connected to the boy. He’s the main character of the novel I’m writing, so there’s more of him coming soon. Your words are very encouraging!

    • This story is full of emotion and danger lurking everywhere for this poor boy. You did a great job of putting me into his head and really feeling his fear. I held my breath for most of this story; so well done. I particularly loved – the face of the injury he found somewhere in his past “must’ve looked a lot like me”.

    • Dear Ana,
      Sorry to hear you’ve been having a hard time, but perhaps hard times are one of the things that makes a great writer. This piece is amazing…goes so much deeper than the circumstances might warrant. I love being inside Beau’s head as his father takes him away from his childhood into the parlor, as adult a place as i can imagine, and Beau isn’t ready. May never be ready, and may in fact be ruined by it. “Beau holds back the rage on his rosy adolescent cheeks while scratching his arm with rough, flimsy nails. The scratching helps soothe him: he knows how much safer it is to refrain, how much easier to chop off his anger, so that he can use the rest of himself–as if it were his sole life commitment–to bounce back and forth from the harsh elusiveness of his father’s moods, to unravel them, to name the pain he carries. ”
      Would love to read more of this story. Hope life gets better for you!
      G

      • Ana replied 1 month ago

        Thank you Georgia. Sorry for taking so long to reply, things went from bad to worse. I love your comments and they give me strength to keep writing.

        • Sorry to hear this Ana…let me know if I can Help!

          • Ana replied 1 month ago

            Thanks Georgiana, you’re so dear. My mom just passed a bit over a week ago, and we’re all struggling. Thanks for your kindness, words help me a lot.

            • I’m so sorry Ana. It is always hard to lose someone dear, but moms perhaps the hardest. Take gentle care. When I lost my mom, for some reason reading The Time Travelers Wife helped…filled with poetry by Rilke. It took me two months to be able to read anything, though. Everyone grieves in their own way and time. Sending you care and light.
              G

          • Thanks a lot for your warm reply. I still cannot concentrate propertly. I guess you’re right and time heals. Thanks a lot.

    • Hi Ana. This is a very gritty piece of writing. As usual, your images are clear and so well done. There are some surprising bits too: ‘He enjoys being a goalkeeper: the roughness of it. Being stepped on the neck, hit in the face by the plunging impacts of leather ball and cleats’. Your work is excellent, Ana. Well done.

      • Ana replied 1 month ago

        Thank you so much June, your comment is very encouraging

  • Hi June,
    this is powerful and thrilling, and one of my favorite stories of yours I’ve read. It’s appropriately confusing, disorienting. The opening is as gloomy as its ending, and I feel it’s telling me something about society in general. Your dry, non-complacent style fits the plot more than ever, and I feel you address the reader as an…[Read more]

  • Hi Adam,
    I wasn’t expecting a twist like that, as the entire piece felt like a classic, somehow melancholic, romantic piece. But I knew you were taking us somewhere, otherwise what was the point of this chance encounter? To show people’s loneliness, or the randomness of connection? I wasn’t sure what to make of it but it’s written in such…[Read more]

  • Hi Charles,
    thanks for the good chuckle. This is incredibly funny. You are quite the storyteller, I wouldn’t mind going out for a beer with you -alcohol free for me! Sure I’d be amused by your stories 😀

  • Ana commented on the post, Guarded by Seyi 2 months, 1 week ago

    Hi Seyi,
    it always amazes me the way you can mix humor into your descriptions no matter how gruesome the scene. I agree with other commenter who pointed out your distinctive voice, I think I’d recognize you if it was written under an alias. I’m definitely not a fan of fantasy but this is very fresh and punchy. Good work!

  • Hi Seyi,
    I’m happy you liked the visual quality of it, as the story came to me as an image. I think the MC could be an interesting character to write a bigger piece on, will think about it. Maybe that could clarify wether he’s a lust killer or something else… As usual, thanks so much for stopping by!

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