Holiday Candy by Hyle Bathurst

Happy holidays! Do you know who the true monsters are?

This content is for Level 1 | Free Short Story Deadline, Level 2 | Serious Deadline, and Level 3 | Awesome Deadline members only.
Log In Register
9 Comments
Oldest
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Melissa
9 months ago

That kept me guessing until the end. I thought they would be vampires, and I never would have guessed giant insects! Well done and very easy to read.

maria delaney
9 months ago

Hi Hyle,
You got me. It confused me why she went with him. Now I know! Your stories are my style. Spooky and surprising. I adore your descriptions and I can’t get enough of the blood and gore. Great job.

Merry Christmas Hyle,
Maria

Jes
Jes
9 months ago

Such a creepy story. I knew there had to be a reason why she went with the guy. I was more thinking heroic reason but sure bugs work too. Great story and great on your descriptions.

Amrita Sarkar
9 months ago

Hi Hyle,
That was such an interesting story! You kept the suspense tight throughout the plot. The characters were well sketched. I loved what you did with the protagonist – a young girl, hungry on a cold night, looking for food, help – I couldn’t help but feel sad for her. And then the creepy man came along. I was wondering like the rest of the readers, why was she hitching a ride with him when she could very well make out that he is a predator. I loved the end. Insects and vermins are something that makes my insides crawl. It was a clever move to not reveal them as vampires. Loved the ending, that was a great climax! Thank you for sharing!

Seyi
8 months ago

Hey Hyle. You nailed it with this one. The line “Cars wouldn’t be enough to flatten me,” made me wonder and when your main character entered the van so willingly and seemed to recognize the “standard fare for pedophiles and human traffickers,” I suspected vampires. Great twist at the death (?) and I loved the names you chose for your main character and her brother. Gremlins got at “Duct” (in Duct tape) and switched it to Duck but apart from this tiny typo, the premise, characters, writing and effect are brilliant. Well done and all the best. Seyi