Eye of the storm – Casey S.

  • : YA - fantasy -adventure
Subscribe
Notify of
6 Comments
Newest
Oldest
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
SJ
SJ
4 months ago

Great Scene!
Tobia’s power is unlocked, Yes! Will his and Talia’s power’s combined defeat the creature?
The monster multiplying by Ryker’s arrows…great concept.
I can’t wait to read next week.

Michael Corvo
4 months ago

Whoa! A lot of action here. I could hear the wind and rain and lighting and feel the heaving of the waves against the boats as I read this. I got a little tripped up on some of the blocking. Riker firing arrows from a small boat (rowboat?) in the rain while bobbing up and down was hard to picture. You also say later that Amara was on the “ground” even though I thought they were on the boat the whole time. I was anxious when Tobias went into the water after Talia because I immediately recalled Talia’s memory early on in the book of him almost drowning. I love seeing the form Tobia’s magic is taking and can’t wait to see how it works in tandem with Talia’s.

Riana N
4 months ago

Hi Casey, this was a good second-last scene, well done!
I enjoyed the building action and dread, especially as they discovered that the creature can indeed move in water and that it is dividing itself into additional monsters when shot – nice touch! 😉
Here and there were little details that wasn’t completely clear – for example, I wasn’t sure if Tobias removed a rope that connected him to the boat so that he could retie his end on Talis, or if he was tying a rope that was attached to him onto Talia to connect the two of them.
But the action here worked well! 🙂